Snizzle

I hate sneezing. My wife hates my sneezing because "it sounds like a hurricane". Maybe that's why I hate sneezing. I have to muffle it for her. A muffle sneeze is never the same as a full on "get the f out of my way" sneeze.

We had a long talk about proper way to sneeze. Yes, instead of discussing things like world hunger or campaign finance laws, we discussed sneezing. She says the correct way to sneeze is to force the blast of air through your sinus and nostrils - effectively clearing everything out. I sneeze through my mouth, which does not resolve the initial reason why a person sneezes.

So me, I had to google it because, well, why the f do you sneeze? http://kidshealth.org/kid/talk/qa/sneeze.html:

When the inside of your nose gets a tickle, a message is sent to a special part of your brain called the sneeze center. The sneeze center then sends a message to all the muscles that have to work together to create the amazingly complicated process that we call the sneeze.

Ok, maybe there's some thought behind the whole "lets blow your brains out" sneeze. The next opportunity I had, I tried this new sneeze all the kids were doing. I failed a few times so I thought I'd practice. (BTW, clenching your jaw works). So the time came...

Holy sweet Martha, I thought my eyeball would pop out...along with a nut. Wifey, FAIL.